Today’s poetry challenge from the dVerse Poets Pub is to write a quadrille (44-word poem) using the word “care” in some form. I thought about the meaning of “caring”, and then the opposite of caring, and remembered a new term I learned recently: “communal narcissism”.
Communal narcissists are not caretaking, they are care-breaking, trouble-making, trust-forsaking. More after the poem…
Hidden Strings
some caretaking
isn’t about caring –
acts of service only for praise
are a selfish undertaking
seeking that validation
now has a name:
communal narcissism
is self-sacrificing manipulation
help with hidden strings
isn’t about caring;
self-anointed community pillars
build their pedestals from favors and expectations
About Communal Narcissism
Communal narcissism is pretend caring displayed through helpful acts in order to get attention and be seen as the most generous and sacrificing person, the one who will volunteer to do anything, with the goal of harvesting intense social praise and applause.
I just learned about this recently, but here’s a great article in Psychology Today from 2016 about it: The Communal Narcissist: Another Wolf Wearing a Sheep Outfit. And here’s another, from just this year: Communal Narcissism—Understanding Collective Self-Centeredness. An explanation helps: “…someone who is a communal narcissist is primarily concerned with being seen as altruistic and benevolent, even if this is not the case.”
If You Know One, Run! or Establish Immoveable Boundaries
I don’t know if you recognize these traits in someone you know or not, but if you do, if my quadrille poem using a form of the word “care” that focuses on NOT caring, just being a communal narcissist, reminds you of someone, I have some advice. This recommendation also uses the word from the prompt: Practice self care. Run. Or at least, establish immoveable boundaries. Do not let yourself be controlled by them.
They are not caretaking, they are care-breaking, trouble-making, trust-forsaking.
dVerse is dBomb
The dVerse prompts have made me a better poet, and they always surface fabulous poems from the participants. You can see all of the ones from the quadrille “care” prompt here: Mr. Linky.
Does This Resonate?
Do you have experience with a communal narcissist? Do you have stories or advice? Please share.
© 2026, Glover Gardens
I’m sure certain politicians would fall in the category described in your poem.
Yes, indeed, I can think of many!
I ran from the one I know though sadly I still have to work in the same space as him. At least he is good fodder for poetry!
Shaun, I’m really sad to hear that. Being trapped at work with a narcissist colleague is awful.
This absolutely resonates so well for me – and the use of the peacock as illustration is spot on! Jae
Thank you, Jae. I felt a little guilty about maligning the peacock, but it’s just a symbol. I still love them, even if they are cheeky birds.
Interesting. I think any kind of narcissist is someone to run from, but the communal kind is a new concept for me.
Same here! I hadn’t heard that phrase or designation until recently, and when I dove in, it really resonated. This is a recognizable type.
Alas there is a lot about posing care, but I find it even worse to be nothing but selfish.
Yes!
I can think of a few in the public eye, Kim. Thankfully, I don’t know any personally.
Definitely there are some in the public eye; I’ve known one or two personally but no longer am I in the same space.
Celebs especially fall into this group. I hadn’t heard the descriptive term before, and it’s great to know it. Well done!
You’ve hit on something here. Caring is not about self-indulgence.
Right! Caring is done for its own sake, not for personal gain or to look like a saint.
This is absolutely stellar writing, Kim! ❤️❤️ I resonate with; “communal narcissism is self-sacrificing manipulation.”
Plenty of “influencers” on the wild word of the internet fall into this category as well. Nicely done.
KIm, I loved this poem! And yes caretaking should be done for honest reasons (as every undertaking should) I loved the peacocks in the photos as well! 🩵